shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
