Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
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