Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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