Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
