remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
