she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
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