look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
There's always time for handjobs
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?