he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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