there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
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