oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
