I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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