Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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