Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
