I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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