that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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