Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
