forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize