I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize
