A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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