He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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