last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
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