There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Randomize
