It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Randomize
