Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
Randomize
