I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
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