I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Randomize