Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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