I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
Randomize