smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
