it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
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