I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
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I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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