I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Randomize