is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
Randomize
