nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
i drank out of a bidet.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?