school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
How does it feel to date your dad?
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize
