I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Randomize