I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Randomize
