Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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