Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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