you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize