He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize