when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
