Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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