Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
I understand Curling. That high.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
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