Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
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