You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.