im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
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