i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
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He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
So. Much. Porn.
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