i don't like sucking hair
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
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