i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Randomize